It's You Chapter 32

JaeHwa
"Who the hell was that guy?" I demanded when it was just Hyunnie and me. I was in total shock. I mean, he'd just put my hand over his heart! And I felt his heartbeat!
"Never mind that, did you feel anything Jae?" she demanded back.
"What do you mean never mind?!" I exclaimed.
"By meaning never mind!" she replied, looking as white as a sheet.
"Hyunnie.. are you okay?" I asked, feeling concerned.
"Look, I just need to know if you felt anything when you touched him," she said, looking me square in the eye.
"I..." I started, then did a quick mental flashback.

Flashback:
What are you going to do? I thought, as he picked up my hand. His own hand was shaking slightly, I could feel it. But it felt oddly comfortable to have him holding my hand. I felt like I could hang on to it forever.
Then I stiffened. After all, this was a total stranger holding my hand. I brought my gaze up to his face. His eyes were watching me intently, as if waiting for a reaction. "What do you want from me?" I felt like asking.
"Don't worry, I'm not going to do anything to you," he said. And I was instantly transported back to a place. Flashes of sunset colours. Rain. A phone box. Fried rice? A racing game on a television screen. A room full of pink. A boy and a girl sitting in one bed, talking. I couldn't see their faces. Everything was so blurry. The boy slipping his arm around the girl's waist as they fell asleep. "I won't do anything to you, relax," said a familiar voice.
Then I was dumped back into the hospital room.
And felt him place my hand on his chest. Over his heart. I stared at my hand. I stared at him. I felt like I was falling. I could feel his heartbeat through the layers of clothes. My mind left the room again. I could feel my breath getting faster, but I could see nothing but a dark room. A boy and a girl were sitting on the bed. No conversation, but I watched the boy place the girls' hand over his heart. Watched as their heads slowly drifted closer to each other.
I felt like I was in a dream. I snapped back to reality. This face in front of me... I lifted my other hand and touched his face slowly, running down his jaw, placing it behind his neck. I felt like I could hug this person. This...
DongHae. A voice in my head. DongHae? East Sea?
What re you doing?! my mind screamed at me. I blinked and fell back to earth with a thud that no one heard. What...? Why am I touching his face?
"What are you doing?!" I yelled, and gave him such a hard push that he fell right off the bed.

Hyunnie was looking at me.
"So....?" she said gently.
I swallowed. "Nothing," I said, not quite catching her eye. "There was nothing."
---
When HyunJae and my parents left I lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling. The clock said it was 9pm. I felt exhausted. Too much information. Too much drama. Too much mystery.
Was it too much to say that I didn't feel anything? I'd definitely felt something. But I had no idea what it was. Maybe if I ignored it, it would go away.
I want it to go away. I was feeling so many different emotions. I felt like I'd explode.
I turned over on my side and looked at the single flower on my bedside table. Who'd put it there? I spotted the table's drawer and pulled it out. Just to see what was in it.
It was an iPod.
Just a small one, an iPod shuffle. No screen.
I pulled it out of the drawer and plugged in, pressing the play button.
다른 사람 필요 없어 난 그냥 너라고
다시 한번 물어봐도 난 그냥 너라고.
Darun saram piryo eobseo, nan geunyang neorago
Dashi hanbeon muleo bwado, nan geunyang neorago.
I don’t need anyone else, it’s only you
When you ask again, it’s only you
That voice again.
I stifled a sob.
But I couldn't stop the tears from falling.
But these tears... for what?

DongHae
I cried on the way home. I didn't want to, but somehow I just couldn't keep them in.
Kyu squeezed my shoulder symphatetically from the backseat.
Hyukkie had no choice but to keep both hands on the wheel.
None of us made a sound the whole journey back.
Well, apart from the occasional whimper from me. That was hard to keep in.
RyeoWook was the one who opened the door.
And with RyeoWook you kinda know what to expect.
He took one look at my face and his mouth dropped open.
And his lower lip began to tremble.
"Wookie, it's not -" HyukJae started, darting forward to stop him, but RyeoWook had turned violently, walking into YeSung hyung.
"Ooph, Wookie, I think you've winded me," YeSung hyung started, but Wookie buried his head in his shoulder and started howling. "What...?" YeSung looked around questioningly while patting Wookie on the head.
Then he spotted us.
Or, more accurately, he spotted me.
"Oh my God," he said, eyes wide. "Hae..." He put a hand up to his mouth.
But before he could say another word, SungMin had barreled right into us. "DongHae...! What's going on?! How is she?!" he squealed, then pulled back from me when I gave no reaction. I was still numb. He searched my face and his eyes rested on mine. Judging from the look on his face, the were probably as red as the strawberries he loved.
"Hae!" he yelled, shaking me. "Tell me what's going on! You're scaring me!"
Hyuk darted forward again. He seemed to understand I was still incapable of... anything really. And Kyu never let go of my shoulders. Another time when I feel like he's the hyung, not me.
"It's not what you think," said Hyuk quickly.
"Where's JaeHwa?!" SungMin yelled, almost hysterical. "She's... she's not..."
"No!" said HyukJae. "She's alive hyung, she's awake...!" He didn't get to say another word after that because SungMin had pulled him into a hug so tight that it looked like an anaconda crushing it's prey slowly to death.
"Hyung, I think that HyukJae hyung's kinda... umm... dying," said Kyu, gently steering me into the room. He pushed me down onto the sofa. "I'll get you a glass of water, hyung." He walked into the kitchen. In the background I could hear SungMin yelling that JaeHwa was alive! JaeHwa's alive, everyone!
Yes Min, JaeHwa's alive, but she doesn't remember you, me or anyone else in this room. So why are you wasting your breath?
Suddenly the others were all around me, sitting next to me, on the floor, standing. Just generally being there. I don't even remember them coming out of their rooms, just them being there.
So how many minutes had passed since I'd sat down?
And why was Kyu taking so long to get me that water?
I felt like I was in a press conference. All these questions, all about JaeHwa.
JaeHwa.
What would I do without Hyukkie. My manager when everything falls apart. And Kyu. My assistant who's more like a caretaker. I'd only need KiBum now, but he's away. I wish he was here. It doesn't feel like Super Junior when one of us is missing.
Hyukkie answered all the questions for me. Everyone just assumed that she was fine, that she remembered us. Well, I wouldn't blame them, if I wasn't there I would have assumed it too.
Finally, a lull in all the clammering voices. I was starting to get a headache. I looked down at my hands, clasped tightly around the glass of water. They were shaking. Any minute now and the glass would spill over. Thank God I hadn't taken even a sip. My stomach felt like it would spill over soon.
"There's one thing you should know hyungs," said Kyu, taking advantage of the momentary silence. "Jae... she's lost some of her memory. She can't remember any of us..." I saw him glance swiftly at me. "... including DongHae hyung."
The world exploded again.
I can't take this anymore.
"Shut up!" I yelled, standing up. I felt so... pissed. So drained. So angry at being forgotten this easily. I felt like hunting down the driver who did this to Jae and knocking his memory out.
"Calm down DongHae," said Teukie hyung, standing up slowly.
I stared at him, breathing wildly. My heart was hammering nineteen to the dozen. I've been angry with myself before - you should have seen me when I broke it off with JaeHwa... I would have killed myself if Hyukkie hadn't intervened - but not, never with the other members. Not as angry as this.
"Calm down?" I asked, disbelievingly. "You're telling me to calm down?" I saw SungMin, HanKyung and KangIn hyung standing up, and SiWon starting to move forward. I nearly snorted. Did they think I was going to hit someone? "The girl that I love is sitting in a hospital ward, with no inkling of who I am at all, and you're telling me to calm down?!"
"DongHae, she'll recover. One day, and it might even be tomorrow, she might wake up and remember you," said HeeChul hyung, comfortingly. I surveyed the room, seeing RyeoWook huddled up with YeSung and Teukie hyung, and felt more anger boiling in my very soul.
"We understand, DongHae," said SiWon earnestly. "Just -"
Is there any way to go beyond boiling point? Because I seem to have gone past it. Way past it.
"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING!" I screamed, throwing the glass of water at the wall. The glass shattered around us. I turned and ran into my room, slamming the door behind me and leaning against it.
Oh God, what have I just done?
---
EunHyuk
He hasn't been talking.
It's been a week now.
We're debuting (again) soon.
When we get back from training he goes straight to his room.
SungMin says he doesn't do anything. Doesn't say anything.
What a time to get depressed.
We have a gazillion new things to do, even though we've already filmed the new MV for the title song (not releasing anything at this point). It's hard when he's not communicating.
Ah, why am I always the one put up to this?
They know I'm not good at talking... especially when Hae's being like this.
Oh well, practice makes perfect, I guess.
I knock on the door.
"Hae?" I venture.
No reply.
As if I wasn't expecting that.
I timidly turn the doorknob and slip in. Like a cat.
Somebody tell me why the heck I feel like I've committed an offense.
There he is. Sitting facing the window, clutching a pillow. I round the chair til I'm facing him. His face looks like it's made of marble.
Damn. DongHae's turned cyborg. Like in BoA sunbae's music video.
"DongHae..." I say, dragging up another chair. "Look, you know I'm not good to these things. But the others are really worried about you and..."
He turns to stare blankly at me.
Damn, I'm getting the creeps now.
"And... we need you right now," I decide to continue like nothing's happened. Like my skin isn't getting goosebumps. "Because the album's going to release soon, and we're all busy but..."
"I know. I'm in the way."
Oh gosh, did he just talk? A miracle! DongHae's talking!
"You're not in the way," I say patiently. "You're not in it enough. Don't you think you're taking this a bit far...?"
I instantly regret saying the words as soon as they're out of my mouth. He's giving me the blank look again.
"A bit far...?" he repeats quietly. Then he switches back to almost normal DongHae. "What do you mean a bit far?!" he says angrily.
"Let me explain," I say quickly, holding up a hand. He deflates back into the chair, looking very tired suddenly. "I know that you're like this because JaeHwa's... in this state... but shouldn't you be doing something about it? Instead of sitting here? Shouldn't you be there by her side every moment you've got, trying to make her remember? I know I'd do that if that happened to Hyunnie..." I cringe slightly at the thought. Never.
"I..." DongHae starts, looking a little taken aback. He looks out of the window again. "It's just that I don't know if I want her to remember, Hyukkie," he says. "I don't want her to remember... the pain I put her through again."
This boy really is impossible sometimes.
"DongHae, she is (was, I think) in love with you, she doesn't care about all that anymore!" I say urgently, shaking him slightly. "Why the hell are you still like this?! I thought you'd gotten over this!"
"Looks like it started again, huh Hyukkie?" he replies, attempting to smile. It doesn't come off right.
At that moment his phone rings. He pulls it out of his pocket, glancing at the screen.
"Do you know this number?" he asks, frowning a little. I shake my head. "Ah, what the heck," he says, flipping the phone open.
"Hello?" he says. "Nuguseyo? Who is this?" He listens for a while, his eyes growing wider every second. "But... how did you get my number?" he asks. More talk. "Ah, of course," he says, eyes shining.
Can I know what the heck is going on? I tug at his sleeve but he shrugs me off, raising a finger to his lips.
Then his expression changes. His mouth drop opens. Worry starts to settle on his face. "What?!" he exclaims. "But... isn't she... how.... when?" Talk. Hysterical yelling? "I'll go now. I'll check the coastal areas. Call me when you find anything!"
He hangs up, looking at me.
"DongHae, what...?"
"JaeHwa's gone," he replies, jumping out of the chair and out the door.

It's You Chapter 31

JunSu
I can't say I wasn't surprised...
But....
WHAT AN IDIOT...

HyunJae
I know I told JaeHwa that he was prepared..
but he so obviously wasn't.
Can I run away now?
I hadn't even told my parents about Hyukkie, though he said we should soon.
That's beside the point.
Oh Hae... you're such an idiot sometimes.

KyuHyun
WHAT THE HELL, DONGHAE HYUNG.
...

EunHyuk
I nearly face-palmed myself. I saw it coming but... not now. Jeez.
I guess none of us were really prepared for JaeHwa's mum's reaction. Or her dad's.
"How long has this been going on?" asked JaeHwa's mum. I nearly keeled over in shock. She didn't sound surprised at all. Or even in shock. Just perfectly normal.
"Less than 2 years," DongHae replied quietly.
"And she knew?" asked Jae's dad.
"We... we were kind of together," said DongHae. He sounded really strained. Maybe he was thinking that this was a bad idea. Like it was.
"I knew it," sighed JaeHwa's mum.
JunSu, Kyu, Hyun, DongHae and I stared at each other, in shock.
"W-What...?" Hyun managed to stammer out.
"Well, JaeHwa was always in her room, always on the phone, always on the computer so we guessed that something was up," said JaeHwa's mum with a smile. She looked at DongHae. "But it stopped for a while when we went to Japan. Did something happen?"
"Something came up," said DongHae faintly.
"Well, it recently started up again, so you got back together didn't you?" she presisted.
Hae could do nothing but nod.
Man, if I were him I'd be almost dead on the ground. I mean, Jae's mum was smiling.
"So... umm... ahjumma... you're... not mad?" I asked.
She looked at me. "Mad, why should I be?" she said, laughing lightly. JaeHwa's dad was smiling slightly. The hell...?
JaeHwa's mum turned to look closely at DongHae. "Aaah," she said, nodding slightly. "I know where I've seen you before. You're part of Super Junior, aren't you?"
Kyu looked ready to faint. I felt like bursting into hysterical laughter. Or running away. Or something.
JaeHwa's dad walked up to Hae. "How old are you?" he asked.
"I-I'm 23 this year," he answered, looking ready to run.
JaeHwa's dad nodded. "Not bad. Don't look so scared, I just want to thank you."
"Thank me? For what?" asked Hae, looking even more bewildered. Poor guy. This definitely wasn't what he expected.
But before JaeHwa's dad could answer, the doors opened and the doctor billowed out. We rushed towards him. He held up a hand to stop our flood of questions and pointed to the corner. It was pretty comical. We all turned and watched a wheelchair being pushed into view.
Oh gosh.

DongHae
I couldn't stop the huge grin from spreading over my face when I saw her. She was thinner than what she used to be, that was expected, but apart from that she was exactly the same. Nothing had changed. It was JaeHwa.
"JaeHwa!" Hyun squealed, running towards the wheelchair. We followed in a less hysterical pace, although JaeHwa's parents were clearly restraining themselves from sprinting after HyunJae. I know I was.
Jae broke into a wide grin when she saw HyunJae. "HyunJae" she exclaimed, holding out her arms. HyunJae gave her a huge hug, then turned to us.
"Umma, Appa!" JaeHwa cried out happily.
"Oh JaeHwa, you're really back," cried her mum, hugging her.
When she let go, Jae turned to the rest of us with a fading smile.
"JunSu sshi!" she said, sounding surprised. "What are you doing here?"
She turned to HyunJae. "Ooh, don't tell me you two are together!" she teased.
JunSu, Hyuk and I exchanged glances. What was going on...?
A slight tug on my sleeve. The doctor motioned towards us. I went towards him slowly, and Kyu, JunSu and Hyuk followed me.
"What's going on?" asked JunSu when we were out of hearing range.
"It seems that when she hit her head, parts of her memory were slightly damaged, so there are some thing she can't remember," the doctor explained.
"But she remembers HyunJae! And her parents!" JunSu protested, clearly put out.
"It seems that only the recent years have been erased," said the doctor.
This was NOT happening. This kind of thing only happened in stories. In movies. In... music videos!
"How long is recent...?" asked Hyukkie. "As in... how many years?"
"I'd say about 2 - 3 years," the doctor replied. At that moment his pager went off, and he looked at it. "Sorry, I've got to go now," he said, before hurrying off.
The 4 of us collapsed on to the waiting chairs.

KyuHyun
We all looked at each other.
"Now what do we do?" JunSu asked. "She doesn't remember any of us, well she does remember me, but not as the best friend. She probably doesn't even know you guys anymore."
"But we debuted more than 3 years ago," I protested. "I mean... they debuted." A sudden thought struck me. "Oh shit, that means I don't exist in her world anymore." I felt horror rising. I felt sick.
"But she said she didn't know Super Junior when she first met us," DongHae hyung said, looking as bewildered as when JaeHwa's parents had approved him.
"I think she was lying, DongHae hyung," said JunSu. "JaeHwa and HyunJae were gaga over you. They even joined the school's fan club."
"What?!" DongHae exclaimed. Then he shook his head and sat back down, sighing. "Nevermind, that doesn't matter anymore."
"But she didn't give any reaction when she saw us," reasoned Hyukkie hyung.
"That's right..." I said.
"Oh hang on, I think they only joined like in 2006," JunSu said, brows furrowed. "Yeah, that's right." He looked at us. "Sorry guys, but I think you don't exist anymore."
"We'll see about that," said DongHae hyung, getting up and striding away. We jumped off the chairs and followed him.
I felt torn. I'd known her, loved her like a sister for 2 years. That was all gone. I don't exist anymore. Part of me wanted to disappear, let her get on with her life. But the other part of me wanted to make her remember, to get the old JaeHwa back.

JaeHwa
This was new. I'd never been in a hospital before. And where did HyunJae get that new hairstyle? She looks great! But they've told me it's 2009 now. I don't remember. I don't remember how I wound up here in the first place.
"You'll remember in time, Jae," said Hyunnie. I don't remember when she started calling me Jae. And I don't know why she had such an anxious look on her face.
I was wheeled back to my room, although I really felt like getting out of the chair and running around like a child. I felt... alive. I climbed willingly into bed, stretching out. Just like old times, when it was just HyunJae and me.
Umma and Appa left the room. Probably to talk to the doctor.
A knock on the door.
HyunJae went to open it, hanging her head as 4 guys entered the room. I wonder why JunSu's here. We'd never exchanged more than a few words in school, just the occasional smiles and the obligatory questions. And who were the other 3 guys? They looked familiar, like I'd seen them out of a magazine... or was it a newspaper? I can't remember. Two of them seem familiar anyway. The last guy, the tall one with the curly hair, I've never seen him in my life.
"Hello," I said, giving a tentative smile.
JunSu flopped into the couch nearby, his head in his hands.
The curly-haired guy sat down next to him, looking blank.
Umm, what?
One of the guys sat on my bed. He looked so familiar right now. And he looked like a dinosaur. Or was it a fish? No, the other guy looked more like a fish. The one with his arm around HyunJae?
"HyunJae, what?" I asked.
She smiled sadly at me. "Jae, this is HyukJae," she explained, gesturing.
"HyunJae and HyukJae? Gosh, you guys sound like twins," I said.
They smiled sheepishly.
"JaeHwa," said a voice. I'd heard this voice before. Somewhere. I turned to the dinosaur/fishy looking guy sitting in front of me. Whoa, since when did he get so close? I scrutinized his face. He was oddly cute/good looking.
"Fishy," I said. I don't know where it came from. It just popped out.
"Fishy," he breathed. It seemed to make sense to him.
"Mianhae," I said, pulling a face. "I don't know where that came from." But even so, something was telling me to reach out, to touch this guy. I lifted a hand, but dropped it again. I didn't know him. Why would I do something like that?

DongHae
I saw her raise her hand a little. Like she was going to touch me. But she let it fall. Was she feeling something?
Ah, whatever, I'll just take the chance.
"Who are you?" she asked, confusion clearly etched on her face.
"Don't you remember me?" I asked back. She met my gaze, then looked away.
"No, I don't, mianhae," she replied. "But I feel like I've seen you before. Somewhere. Like in a dream. Do you know me?"
I nearly smiled. Right now I know you more than you know yourself, you silly girl.
"Maybe you'll remember this," I said instead, picking up her hand. She stiffened a little, and her eyes travelled up to search my face. "Don't worry, I'm not going to do anything to you," I said, reminiscing about the time when we'd shared a bed and she went all worried. I felt like laughing and crying at the same time. With her eyes firmly on me, she relaxed. I brought her hand up to my chest, and placed it over my heart, my hand over hers.
It was a split second reaction. She gasped slightly, her breathing quickening. Almost in a daze, she brought her other hand up and touched my face.
It was over in a second. Her expression became shocked. "What are you doing?!" she exclaimed, pushing me away. I fell off the bed, landing on my butt. Kyu and JunSu jumped off the couch and helped me up. She stared at me with wide eyes. "I have no idea who you are... you had no right to do that!" she yelled at me, then looked down at her hand. Hyun sat down next to her.
"Just go, Hae," she said, looking sadly at me.
I turned away so nobody would see the single teardrop escape from my right eye.

EunHyuk
There was a connection. I saw it.
Her expression softened, and she almost looked like she remembered him.
She'd even said his nickname, Fishy.
Is it possible to pick a random word like that out of nowhere... which totally relates to him?
It's heartbreaking, it really is.
He thought no one saw him cry.
I did.

It's You Chapter 30

DongHae
I picked up her hand. "Hey Jae." Sunlight streamed through the window above the bed, illuminating the room. I was glad she had her own room. I could bring her little things and other people wouldn't give me weird looks. Like the solitary dark red rose I'd placed at her bedside.
I don't know why I was doing this alone. I guess I needed some alone time with her.
Even though I was really alone with myself.
I interlaced my fingers with hers. It calmed me, I guess, to hear my own voice, thinking that one day, maybe, she would talk back. Until that day came, I'd still wait.
"It's February, Jae, and you know what means," I said, plugging the earphones into the iPod I'd brought. I flicked the hold button and turned on the iPod. "It's Valentine's Day! Can you believe that it's been 2 years since we met?" Geez, has it only been 2 years? Felt longer than that. I placed a hand on her hair. It was still soft, still shiny. "It's been almost 2 months, Jae. Wake up soon, okay? When you do, I'll be here waiting. I love you." I turned back to the iPod. "This is for you. It's from our new album that's coming out next month. This is specially for you, no one knows this song yet." I gently plugged the earphones into her ear and pressed the play button.
"It's called Neorago, It's You," I said. I leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead before getting up to leave. HyunJae was outside the door when I opened it. She reached forward and gave me a hug.
"I know this is hard, DongHae," she said, her voice muffled.
"It's hard for you too, Hyun," I said, my voice catching. I'd promised myself I wouldn't cry. I was a terrible promiser.
"But I'm not the one working my butt off for the new album. You look so tired." She let go and scrutinized me. "You and Hyuk have lost so much weight."
I ran a hand over my face. "Don't worry, Hyun, it's just that we're really nervous about the new album. It's... different."
"I know, Hyuk let me hear a song. You guys have really grown up huh?"
"Don't tell me it was Hyukkie who gave you that song."
"Umm, yeah."
I was going to have to silence that boy. He didn't know when to keep his mouth shut.
"I'm fine, Hyun. Really."
She still looked worried, but she didn't say anything. "Hae, she's going to get better, right?" she asked suddenly.
"Yes," I said firmly. "It's that thought that's keeping me alive now, Hyun."
"Don't say that, Hae!"
"I've got to go. Call me, or at least Hyukkie, if anything happens."
"Take care, Hae."
---
"I think I'm getting pre-album release jitters," said HeeChul, pulling a face.
"But you're hardly in the album, hyung," I said cheekily.
"Sit down and shut up, Lee DongHae," said KangIn angrily.
"Sorry, I was just trying to lighten the atmosphere," I said, bowing. "Seriously. I'm really nervous too."
"Is JaeHwa getting better, hyung?" asked RyeoWook in a small voice.
"Apart from that time when her finger twitched, nothing," I said. I tried to keep my tone light. I didn't like them worrying so much when they were already so stressed.
"She'll get better Hae," said Teukie hyung confidently. "You're not giving up are you?"
"He's still here hyung, so he's definitely not giving up," said Hyuk, slinging an arm around me. "But even though he's been looking more like a man lately, he hasn't really been acting like it," he added, ruffling my hair. I had to admit, I kinda liked it short like this but maybe I'd try it long soon to see what I looked like.
"Yeah, well, you still look like a monkey," I retorted, and the others laughed.
Any day now.
Please make it soon.

HyunJae
I don't know how long I can keep this up.
This... false me.
Not that it's THAT false, I'm still myself, but I'm not acting in a way that I should be...
My best friend's in a coma. And I'm... acting happy.
Just what is the matter with me?
It's already the end of February. The boys have been as busy as ever, with the new album releasing any day now.
I haven't heard Hyuk's voice for a long time.
It's as lonely as ever.
I sighed as I sat down next to Jae.
"Hey Jae, it's me. Again. I know, you're probably wondering why I keep wandering into your room like this, why I'm not in uni right this minute, why I keep talking to myself." I sighed again. "Well, it's Saturday and there aren't any classes today, and I miss you."
I noticed her finger twitch a little, but according to the doctor that was normal. Just reflexes. But at least it meant that she was still alive.
"We all miss you, DongHae especially. He looks so serious these days, he's really worried. And he keeps saying that if you died... then there's no reason for him to live."
Another finger twitch.
"I hope you can hear me. I hope that all this seeps through the fog in your brain and somehow you can understand me. It's terribly lonely without you. It's like when you moved to Japan all over again. Only then we could at least talk online."
Silence.
"It's going to be my birthday soon, Jae. 12th of March, remember? I don't want anything this year. I just want you to respond to me, Jae. To wake up and laugh and smile and... be Jae. I just want you back. That's all I'm asking for."
I didn't notice her eyelids moving.
"Please Jae? Look, DongHae left you another flower. He saw your parents the other day. He was all set to confess to them that he was in love with you, but he decided that he'd do that when you wake up. So wake up soon, okay, so you won't have to hide from your parents anymore. So you can be with DongHae again."
Her eyelids fluttered. But I was too busy staring down at her hand. Her fingers curled, then relaxed. She took such a deep breath that her body lifted slightly off the bed. Her hand clenched again. I looked at her face. And found her staring up at the ceiling with unfocused eyes.
"DOCTOR!" I screamed, jumping out of my chair and running out of the room.

JunSu
"Hyun, I can't hear you or understand you!" I yelled into the phone.
HyunJae had called me just a few seconds ago, but I was busy playing WOW (World of Warcraft). I was up against this guy but Hyun's call made me lose. Oh well. All I could hear was incoherent yelling, so obviously it drained my concentration.
"Talk slowly!"
Again, incoherent yelling.
"HyunJae! Take a deep breath..."
Silence at the end of the line.
"Good, now tell me what the hell is going on."
"Just... get here now. JaeHwa needs you."
She hung up.
Oh shit. Oh shit shit shit.

DongHae
I ran into the hospital, Hyukkie hot on my heels. Behind him was KyuHyun, who really wasn't as fast as us even with his giraffe-long legs.
I dodged people and ignored the nurse. I'd even forgotten to cover my head, but I doubt anyone would recognize me, not when I was now a human tornado.
We raced up the stairs, and I heard Kyu puffing behind us. "Come on, Kyu!" I encouraged him. "We're almost there!"
I turned the corner and immediately saw HyunJae and JunSu standing in the deserted corridor.
"DongHae!"Hyun said, different emotions reflecting across her face at once. She gave me a quick hug and then ran to Hyuk. JunSu was speechless.
"Hyun, what's going on?" asked Hyukkie, breathless. Kyu slumped into one of the chairs, breathing hard.
"I feel like I've run a marathon," he groaned.
"Well, think about the people who you ran over. You definitely lost the hurdles Kyu," I teased. I turned back to HyunJae. "Where's JaeHwa? What happened?"
"She's opened her eyes, DongHae," said HyunJae, turning to me, her eyes bright.
I sank down into the chair next to Kyu. I felt overwhelmed. I couldn't breath, but that was probably because I'd just run up 5 flights of stairs.
"Hae, are you okay?" asked Hyuk, hugging me.
"I can't believe it," I said happily. "She's back!" It suddenly hit me. JaeHwa was awake. Soon I'd be with her again. And this time nothing would keep me from her. "She's back!" I yelled again, punching the air, a goofy grin on my face.

EunHyuk
This has got to be the happiest day of my life. I can't wait to see JaeHwa again. I'd missed her. And DongHae was different when she wasn't... around. I could see he was trying to be normal, not to stress any of us out because we were already so stressed, but I knew he was hurting inside.
So I did little things for him. I'm not sure he knew it was me. Just small insignificant things, like playing video games with him and eating with him and generally making sure I was there for him. I also made sure he put his clothes into the wash. The boy just threw his clothes everywhere, and SungMinnie couldn't be bothered asking him to chuck them in the washing machine anymore. I always put a glass of water next to his bed when he finally fell asleep, because I knew that he could never really sleep. He'd always wake up in the night.
I'm just happy that he's happy again.
That he can laugh and I won't be seeing the burden in his smile anymore.
I know, I probably sound gay, but DongHae... I won't deny that I love the guy.

"HyunJae!" someone called out. We all turned as JaeHwa's parents rounded the corner. Oh crap. I think that Hyunnie forgot that they were just as involved as we were, and more.
"Ah, HyunJae sshi, the doctor called us, how is JaeHwa?" asked JaeHwa's mum, looking ecstatic.
"I don't know ahjumma, the doctor hasn't come out yet," Hyunnie replied, giving me a quick-get-out-of-here look.
I grabbed Kyu's arm and was about to leave (hoping that Hae would follow us) when JaeHwa's dad decided to say something about the familiar looking strangers loitering around the corridor.
"I feel like I've seen you guys before," he said, looking skeptically between Hae and I. "In fact, you were here as well when JaeHwa was first admitted."
I was about to make something up on the spot when Hae stepped forward. He was about the same height of JaeHwa's dad. "I think there's something you need to know," he said gently.
Kyu, Hyun and I exchanged horrified glances. Hell no. The idiot wouldn't do this now.
"Hae!" I hissed, staring wide eyed at him. JaeHwa's parents glanced at me but turned back to DongHae. You could tell they had kind of guessed what he was going to say.
"Well, what is it?" asked JaeHwa's dad.
DongHae opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He cleared his throat and swallowed. He took a deep breath.
God DongHae, you are really stupid sometimes.
"Ahjusshi, Ahjumma, I... I'm in love with your daughter."

It's You Chapter 29

DongHae
It's been hours. Actually, I'm not even sure. None of us have watches, I can't be bothered forcing Min's phone from his pocket (because Hyuk and I conveniently left ours back at the dorm) and the floor is much more interesting than seeing all the other people staring at us.
Or, rather, me, seeing as Hyuk and Min have fallen asleep.
I feel squashed. Hyuk might look thin, but he's not as light as you think.
My shoulders are going to come right off soon.
I can't even think of sleeping right now. How can I? One of the people I love the most in the world might be dying in there, and the last time I saw her in person was, what, 6 months ago?
And she didn't even tell me she was coming back.
I can already imagine her planning her very own surprise. Smiling to herself, jumping around the room in excitement.
I smile.
This was so unfair on her.
I suppress a sob.
I lift my eyes from the floor. Most people are asleep in the chairs, JaeHwa's parent and HyunJae and JunSu included. Why didn't everyone just sleep on the floor? You could stretch your legs at least. And JunSu has the longest legs I've ever seen.
---
The light above the operation theatre doors went out. At the same time the hospital doors burst open. Umm, the doctors HAD to come out from the theater doors right, not the hospital doors...?
"Hyung!" Why did it sound like KyuHyun? I looked around, scrambling to my feet.
Min and Hyuk fell into the space I'd just shot out of, knocking their heads together. Well, at least I can say that it wasn't me who woke them up.
"HAE! Ow...!"
"What was that for?!"
I ignored them, still looking around for Kyu. "Kyu?" I called.
"Hyung!" Kyu ran out of nowhere, careering right into me. Don't get me wrong, I'm not that short but Kyu was still taller than me... not to mention coming at me like a winded rhinoceros. I felt a bit winded. "I came as soon as I could," he said, clinging on to me.
"Who brought you?" I asked, patting him on the back. Okay, now I feel short. Go ahead, laugh at me.
Kyu let go of me and turned. I looked around him. Teukie hyung came striding up the corridor, hair covered by a cap and hood. If I didn't know him better, I reckon he would have brought all of Super Junior. But Teukie hyung wasn't like that. He didn't like the spotlight very much.
"How is she?" he asked when he came up to us. Kyu drifted to Min and Hyuk, who both looked half-asleep.
"I don't know..." I answered, my gaze drifting to the chairs. Wait... weren't JaeHwa's parents right there a minute ago? I looked around wildly, catching a glimpse of them disappearing behind a corner. I ran forward, but Hyuk and Kyu pulled me back. "I've got to know!" I hissed at them, when someone suddenly careered out of nowhere into Hyuk.
"Oh, I'm winded," groaned Hyuk, massaging his chest.
"Hyun," I said, grabbing her by the shoulders. JunSu followed behind her, looking wary. HyunJae looked away from me, eyes trained on the ground. A tear slipped down and splashed on my shoe. I shook her a little, willing her to answer me. Instead she tore herself out of my grasp and threw her arms around Hyuk, who held her tight.
"She's in a coma, Hyukkie, she -" She suddenly sobbed and buried her head in his chest. Out of the corner of my eye, someone fell to the ground. I did nothing. I was totally numb. I was dimly aware of someone guiding me to a chair, someone putting their arms around me, but I didn't know who. I felt like someone had knocked me out with a sledge hammer.
Someone - I think it was Teukie huyng - pulled me into a hug and pulled my head into his shoulder.
It was then that I let out a sob.
It was then that the shakes started.

KyuHyun
This couldn't be happening. This wasn't happening.
That wasn't DongHae hyung shaking and sobbing in Teukie hyung's arms.
That wasn't SungMin hyung comforting JunSu.
That wasn't HyunJae practically buried in Hyukkie hyung.
I'd pinch myself and get myslef out of this dream, this nightmare.
I've been pinching myself since they told me.
And I still haven't woken up.
I whimpered, my lip trembling. JaeHwa...
The very first image I had of her lit up in my head. I'd loved her then and I still did. She was more than a friend... she was my sister.
When her heart broke mine did too. I wanted to hold her and tell her everything was going to be alright.
I wish I could do that now.
I whimpered again, feeling my entire body breaking down. SungMin pulled me into a hug.
"You're allowed to cry, Kyu, just let it go," he whispered in my ear, his voice quivering slightly. I clung to him. I swallowed but the lump in my throat refused to go down.
---
JunSu
I can see her. I can see her through the glass.
She looks like Jae.
She is Jae.
But Jae wouldn't be lying here. Jae wouldn't be motionless. Jae wouldn't be as pale as this.
She's not Jae.
Jae's gone.

DongHae
She looks so perfect. So porcelain-like. As if I could break her just by picking up her hand.
It's not her.
"I know what you're thinking," said a voice behind me. I turned. JunSu stood beside me, hand on JaeHwa's window. "That's not JaeHwa. Not the JaeHwa we know, anyway." He looked at me. "Correct?"
I nodded. Before I can say anything, he turned towards me so we were looking each other in the eyes.
"What were you to her, DongHae sshi?"
"I... I loved her."
"We all did. And still do. Be honest, DongHae sshi."
"Look - "
"When Jae got attacked I promised myself I wouldn't let anyone hurt her again. I made myself her bodyguard. I swore to protect her with my life. And what did you do?
"JunSu, what -"
"You broke her heart, DongHae sshi." He stared at me, willing me to say something.
"It was for the best, JunSu."
"So you thought. Do you know how much she cried? Do you know how much pain you cost her? Even when she smiled I could see she was dying inside. But you didn't care, did you?"
"You -"
"You nearly killed her, DongHae!" he yelled. HyunJae tore herself away from the glass.
"Stop it, Jun!" she cried, pulling him backwards. He ripped his arm out of her grasp, pushing me to the wall. Was I really going to get bullied around by a kid 4 years younger than me? I pushed JunSu back against the opposite wall.
"You have no idea," I said, breathing hard through my nose. He struggled, but I pinned him down. Hyuk tried to pull me back, but I stood my ground. "You have no idea how much it killed me to do that, JunSu. You have no idea. It nearly killed me too. But you saw, she got better. She forgot me. It hurt, but at least she was alright. And no one hurt her again. So don't judge me JunSu. I did it all for her." I released him, stepping backwards.
He staggered forward, catching his breath. Hyun helped him up. He looked at me. "So what is she to you, DongHae?" he asked.
"I love her with all my heart," I said, looking him square in the eye. "And I'll love her until the end of time, until the day I die." I waited for him to challenge me again.
Instead, he grinned at me.
"Just what I was looking for," he said, smiling.
He held out a hand.
What. The. Hell.